Tag Archives: fear

Hit

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You

Knocked the breath out of her.

Hands hit skin,

Words hit heart.

She was fearful

Of everyone.

Scared to speak.

Scared to move.

To say the wrong word,

To give the wrong look.

Her legs always shaking step by step.

Heaven forbid a tear should fall

(You damn crybaby)

Her voice so small

(Speak up! Speak up! But only when I tell you to!).

Eyes on the floor.

Walk so very softly.

(Become the wallpaper upon the wall

Your fingers never touch)

When She breathes, if she breathes,

Hold it, listen.

(What the hell are you wearing?)

Do not move another step

Until

Television volume up high

To mask the sound of her

Existence.

(They walk among us)

The controllers and abusers,

The controlled and abused.

And Momma always said

You never know what goes on behind

Closed doors.

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Sister

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I dreamt I was a

Little girl again,

Wearing a white prairie dress.

I came upon a lone house in the countryside

Surrounded by beautiful trees,

But the sky was dark and i was alone.

I entered the house,

Something told me it was home.

It was dingy and empty and falling apart,

Fear began to grip my heart.

I started calling my sisters name only to hear my footsteps in return.

I thought maybe to lay upon the floor and look no more

When down the stairs she

Came dressed just like me,

(The only exception being her hair of red and my hair

Of black.)

She took me by the hand and led me to

The door.

We went outside to sit and play in the dirt,

The sky now a dusty brown.
I was fearful but felt comfort in her presence.

She stopped playing suddenly and looked me in the eye to whisper

“My mommy does not like me.”

To which I replied,

“Neither does mine.”
Oh sister

My sister,

My sister how I love thee.

Someone

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Someone told me
The people who did these things to me are not here anymore.
They can no longer hurt me.
Why this did not occur to me before,
I do not know.
Maybe because i still hear their
Voices.
Maybe because every sense and nerve in me reacts to
Certain noises and movements as if those people are still in the same room with me;
I feel the ghost of their touch.
I am ready to let them go now;

To see them, to feel them fade
Away into nothingness.
They can no longer keep
Their
Invisible grip
Because you cannot
Imprison
Peace.
You cannot hold love captive.
I am no longer fear,
I am love
And love is free.

Without Fear

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You are afraid of the way she leaves you

Reeling.

She can feel you.

See more than your skin.

Parts of you not one single heart has

Seen.

Or held.

No questions

Or explanations.

Just being.

You move to her without resistance

For there is none left,

Not even in your darkest parts.

The voices have hushed.

She has penetrated and annihilated the threat

For she is audacious.

Reached into them with her unspoken light

And held each one to her soul.

Singing them to sleep

Without destroying herself.

Now look.

Without fear there is only

Love.